Last night’s “Aha moment”

 Last night a reader’s comment was really getting under my skin but I tried letting it go and going to bed.

About what seemed like an eternity, probably 10 mins, I decided to pray and hand it over to our heavenly father. As I prayed I said “I surrender this thoughts and feelings and issue to you, please take them so I can sleep”.

Not much time later I could see in my mind this image of what I imagine Jesus looks like smiling and almost laughing but with a kind face (that one a super loving patient parent would give it’s little toddler) and saying “ok, I’ll take it but you have to actually open your hands and give it to me” and I saw myself there standing in front of Him clenching something in my hands so tight they looked like fists.

I opened my eyes and started laughing! That was so spot on! how many times do we surrender something to God only to keep holding on to it and marinating in it? it’s like: here take it but I’m not letting you take it because I don’t want to let go but I want you to take it and help me but I don’t want to give it to you…

The beautiful thing is how He won’t rip it off our hands, he won’t open our fists, WE have to open our hands and actually hand it over, while He patiently stands there waiting for us to let go and trust.

I’m sharing this in case anyone else out there having rhe same issue I was having last night of trying to hand something over and yet still clenching my hands around it

Luz

Popular posts from this blog

our new obsession

Image
I know I wrote "our" new obsession but let's be honest for a minute it's more "my" new obsession... dried flower bookmarks! Yes, I'm back to my school aged arts and craft years and loving it... honestly anything that can keep mama from falling into a depression stage because it's the end of Summer in the Pacific North West and that means we live in Mordor.  What do you mean? Well California, Oregon, and Washington catch on fire. This means we live in a depressing dreary constant gray existence, surrounded by smoke, we sometimes pretend is a hot fog that smells and play Christmas music. Because it's the Pacific North West and winter is gray,  another dreary gray existance but less depressing? The jury is still out on that but at least you can feel the cool crisp air and fill your lungs of pine beautiful clean air. We have not seen the sun in days and when we do is a Red ball, the moon was so eerie red last night kind of bea
Read more

Triumph Muffins

Image
Simple pleasures are the last healthy refuge in a complex world. Oscar Wilde I try to infuse my life with beauty and simple pleasures as much as I can.  Like my previous post where I talked about flowers by my kitchen sink add a touch of beauty and bring pleasure to a mundane and sometimes dreaded task. I think the world is just to full of yuck, hate, separation, stress, worries, pain, etc. And our home should be a refuge. A place where we can rest, breathe, find solace. When we are at home our souls should be at rest, or as much as possible, I don't think we'll ever be at rest until we're united with God like St Augustine writes in his confessions  “ You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You". But you get my point. One of the ways I like to infuse my home with beauty and make it comfortable to be in is by trying to always have baked goods for snacks.  Baking is something I find infused with pleasure from the moment I put
Read more

Rose Cake and some things I have been pondering lately...

Image
Sunday was Mother's Day, oh what a complicated day.  So many women experience an incredible amount of emotions on that one day... the loss of a child, infertility, loss of a mother, oh so many things and triggers that can come up in this one day. My prayers go out to all women on this day, I've known the pain of infertility, of miscarriage, and of not having my own mother on this day. It can also bring up the attack society places on moms. The feeling of not enough, of seing motherhood as a waste of your talents, time, and the saddest one it being a burden.  But it is not, How magnificent it is that as women we get the gift to work hand in hand with God in creating and raising inmortal souls! As a mother your body has at some point held two souls inside of it at one time (or 3 if you had twins!) What a gift! Knowing that and how God gave you those little souls because He thinks you are the best person to raise them, with your shortcomings and flaws, with your gifts, and how we
Read more